Numb...
Feeling soooo numb...

Thanks for making me feel so numb, my loves...
Credit to u.. i feel nuthin' at all & heart is hollow now...

Thank u, Jesus.... I've learned a lesson...
I'll keep my head up high no matter wut...

Numb... yes, I am...
Numb... yes, I'll be...
Numb.... from now till forever more~

i dun even no the date...
maybe 12th?? maybe 13th..?
well who gives a shit..? XD
i juz love u so much, dude =]

if u keep it real wit me, i'll keep it real wit u..
im happy n i want u to b happy, too...
everyone's happy when they see us, too =]

gosh.. u make life so meaningful to look at...
thank u... thank u.. thank u....
for loving me like i love u =]

dude, i trust u... n i alwayz will...
so betta trust me, too...
coz i will neva make u sad nor hurt...
i'll change my stupid wayz...
n u betta not make me sad nor hurt...
coz if u do, i break ur neck XD




love u, s paw =]
alwayz hav... n alwayz will b~

Dear God,

Thank you for making me smile each n everyday..
Thank you...
for giving me such wonderful frenz..
for making my life so much easier altho I live in this small miserable city....
for making me happy...
for a peaceful life..
for "Louis Armstrng - What A Wonderful World" song =]
for making me stay alive..
for my content life...

Dear God,
Pls dun make me leave... I dun wanna leave my loved ones...
I want this happiness n frenz forever n ever more...
I hate packing... I hate crying...
I hate saying goodbyes...
I hate suffering from a disease....

I'll be more careful now....
More careful abt my health....

Pls dun make me leave... I'm not ready....

I dun wanna leave them....

I told him 'I love u'
He said 'Luv u 2 babe'



N he said he thought I was joking...



So I said.. Sorry, I wasn't..
But he ignored!



Now I feel so cold...
So juz forget wut I said...
We'll go our separate wayz....
N I think we'll be juz fine =]

I hate u...
I hate u for making me cry...
I hate u coz u neva cum online...
I hate u coz u neva replied my msgs...
I hate u for making me feel this way...
But most of all... I hate myself for loving u this much...

Yea, run away...
I dun deserve u... I'm such a bad influence..
U'll neva be good if u're wit me...
I'll be betta off without u, too...

I hate u.. coz I no u love me, too... n u neva admit it...
I hate ur ignorances...
N I hate hate hate myself coz I didn't say how much I love u when I had a chance..

He looks at me... I fake a smile so he won't see..
That I want and I'm needing everything that we should be...
I'll bet she's beautiful, that girl he talks about...
And she's got everything that I have to live without....

He talks to me, I laugh cause it's just so funny...
That I can't even see anyone when he's with me....
He says he's so in love, he's finally got it right....
I wonder if he knows he's all I think about at night....

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar...
The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star....
He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do....

He walks by me, can he tell that I can't breathe?
And there he goes, so perfectly...
The kind of flawless I wish I could be...
She'd better hold him tight, give him all her love...
Look in those beautiful eyes and know she's lucky cause...


He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar...
The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star....
He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do....

So I drive home alone, as I turn out the light...
I'll put his picture down and maybe get some sleep tonight...

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar...
The only one who's got enough of me to break my heart...
He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do....
He's the time taken up, but there's never enough...
And he's all that I need to fall into..

He looks at me, I fake a smile so he won't see.....


Accidentally saw the chat log of him n his girl...
I tried really hard to luk away.. but it was so tempting...
So i luked... read a little...
Then I realized...
"No, he's not for me... He neva liked me... I'm juz a dreamer... I'm juz dreaming..... He's got his own girl... I shouldn't liked him in the first place...."
My heart hurts.. My head hurts...
"Wut was I thinking..? He sees me as his sister... N I was falling for him.. Gosh, thatz sick... I should run away.. Neva luk back..."

I'm so sorry that I ever liked u...
I'm so sorry that I cared....
I'm sorry coz u neva knew...
I'm sorry I'll neva tell~